Author: Sue Young

August and September – A Conversation

SEPTEMBER: How are you today?

AUGUST: I’m fine. Just wondering why you stole my thunder.

SEPTEMBER: While you were taking drugs, raising hell, getting drunk, burning the candle at both ends, being highly dysregulated, I was…

AUGUST: I don’t do drugs.

SEPTEMBER: Well, while you were doing all those other other things, I was co-0rdinating, planning.

AUGUST: Oh yes, planning, in your unique narcissistic way.

SEPTEMBER: Don’t give me grief. I’m just a month.

AUGUST: I was the one doing all the hard work in the summer season to bring you to the point of were we are now. I was the one who was supposed to be balmy, but no, here you are, once again taking the credit for all my hard work.

SEPTEMBER: Due to unforeseen circumstances, I was indeed more balmy than I expected. I’m sorry if it has caused you distress.

AUGUST: You upstaged me.

SEPTEMBER: Again, it wasn’t planned.

AUGUST: Just before you said you were a planner. You can’t have it both ways.

SEPTEMBER: : ‘The best laid plans of mice and men’

AUGUST: I think you’re jealous. I think you sabotaged me.

SEPTEMBER: Well, you can think what you like. I am what I am.

AUGUST: September should not be like June or July…or August.

SEPTEMBER: But you’re not even like August and you are August. I’m not listening anymore to your crazy ramblings.

AUGUST: Ah, you just called me crazy. You’re gaslighting me!

SEPTEMBER: The fact remains, I brought the weather that you promised.

AUGUST: But you’re supposed to bring cooler fresher weather. Why can’t you be what you’re supposed to be? Why are you always aping me?

SEPTEMBER: While imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, believe me August, I have my own signature. I have no interest in being your type of weather. It was an accident. An oversight. An anomaly.

AUGUST: Those anomalies have been happening a lot lately.

SEPTEMBER: There’s room for us both. I didn’t set out to outdo you. It just happened. I’m sorry.

AUGUST: Big of you to apologise.

SEPTEMBER: I’ve apologized twice now. I won’t be doing it again. I’ve already tried to pull it back, the weather I mean.

AUGUST: Oh please, don’t feel you have to do so on my behalf. Wouldn’t want to hold you back. I want you to be the best version of yourself.

SEPTEMBER: The best version of myself is usually a bit cooler and fresher.

I never meant to make you feel bad.

AUGUST: Yeah, I bet.

SEPTEMBER: Friends?

AUGUST: As long as you don’t keep up this heatwave crap.

SEPTEMBER: I can’t promise, but I do believe the worst is over.

AUGUST: The best, you mean. The best is over.

SEPTEMBER: Thank you for saying so. I will try to do that whole cool, fresh September thing you’re used to, just for old times sake and because I love you.

AUGUST: What? What did you just say?

SEPTEMBER: Well, you know, I love you like a brother.

AUGUST: Yes, I get it. You always keep me in the friend zone. Unlike November.

SEPTEMBER: Leave November out of it.

AUGUST: Hit a nerve I see. Well, goodbye and good luck.

SEPTEMBER: See you same time next year?

AUGUST: Perhaps not. Perhaps I’ll be unseasonably cold.

SEPTEMBER: Oh no, not 1850 all over again. Come on August, stop sulking. You love me really.

AUGUST: I’ll let November do that.

SEPTEMBER: Doesn’t have your charm.

AUGUST: Bet you say that to all the months.

August Aims To Please

Second chance summer

The lover lost and found

Eighth month, slap bang centre

You’ll find me half way down

You saw shades of me

Earlier in the year

First episodes aired in May and June

The seasons premier

Then a commercial break

Which took up all July

Where did the summer go?

Just seemed to go awry

The best part of the series

Is generally Part Two

This is where I stumble in

Looking all askew

Wrapping up the season

I come crumpled through the door

Wondering what’s been going on

Thinkin’ I’ve been here before

Soon I sober up

Get my mojo on

Get into the stride of things

Once brain fog is gone

Oh, right, okay, I’m August, I wrap up summer

I’m the king of months, the month of kings.

Hey man, in between rainy months

It’s been a blur of things

May and June as always

Promised to go dutch

July reneged on the deal

Again, they lied so much

I wandered off, blissfully ignorant

Got dragged back by my tail

Now I’m expected to perform

Now that they’ve all bailed

I’m left with a month’s worth

Of weather, to please the crowds

Just me, no-one else

Among these thunderclouds

I will be there for you

And sunkiss your knees

I will warm your little toes

I like to people please

I am August, you know me

I’ve been long in this summer queue

But by the time I get there

I’ve forgotten what to do

Don’t you worry, I will shine

Up in a cloudless sky

I’ll be the best August, you’ll see

I’ll make your eggs fry

During my finale

I’ll be off on a spree

You’ll call for an encore

Of sun, sand and sea

You’ll applaud my entrance

And I’ll prove to you

I’m not washed up

I’ve lots to do

As the last month of summer

I don’t want to let anyone down

September’s in the wings

Wearing russet gown

Intention is what I’m all about

I do aim to be honest

Please excuse my changeable moods

I want to give you all that I promise.