I was black and I was blue

With a yellow purple hue

Bruised because of you

So thank you

I was grey and I was down

Because of you, psychotic clown

You know you broke my crown

So thank you

I am grateful for your stink

Because it made me think

I started to be pink

So thank you

You took me to the lows

I went from China Rose

To red as Drinkers Nose

So thank you

But now I’m on the rise

The colours are surprised

They’ve suddenly got wise

So thank you

I’m not as green in game

You’re the quagmire heat of blame

You’re the dirty brown of shame

So F you.


Toasted Crumpet

A griddle cake

By any other name

Would taste as sweet

I toast it

Both sides

Now, hot off the press

I spread the



ever so slightly flowing


And watch it seep


Not over the edge

And not out of the bottom

But into the pores

And into the heart of comfort

That is my crumpet