I love you
Because you’re unexpected
Unpredictable
Just salty enough
Tangy enough
I spread you close
Lather you up
Against the butter
Against the toast
But not too much
Less is more with you
You come finely housed in curvaceous glass
Not everyone likes you
But if they like you, they love you
And if they don’t like you, they hate you
And can’t stand the smell of you
Let alone eat you
Some people are taken in by your cunning disguise
They see you all brown and sticky and gooey and think
you are a chocolate spread
And then they eat you, one big mouthful
You’re a nice surprise or a nasty shock
Depending on your outlook and tastebuds
I once was a little frightened of you
And once, I hated you.
But now, I love you, Marmite.
Things In My Head 
such a touching love story LOL thanks for the chuckle, I needed that
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So pleased you liked it. Thank you Carol.
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You’re most welcome
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Please don’t tell my fellow Australians but I’ve been known to drop Marmite or Promite into my shopping basket too, eschewing the nationally iconised (now US owned) Vegemite. Around here that sort of thing can get you tied to a steak and thrown on the barbie (an Australian substitute for a barbeque, where meat is fried on a putrid, greasy slab of iron laid over a stinking, smoky, accelerant-boosted conflagration).
However I did successfully introduce Vegemite to my Singaporean friends, so perhaps my status as a missionary will mitigate my punishment.
One of my (local) friends is generally considered intellectually handicapped (or whatever the currently PC, soon to be offensive and demeaning, term for that sort of thing is). Most of his problems are linguistic and he’s actually a fair bit smarter than most people – including family and professional carers – give him credit for.
A few weeks back he finished a late night phone call by saying he was going to have some Milo in milk and go to bed. I replied I was going to have a Promite sandwich and do the same.
“What’s Promite?”
“It’s like Vegemite but different.”
“Why is it different?”
“Promite’s for pros. Vegimite’s for vegies.”
A pause, then outrage.
“Why do they give me Vegemite sandwiches at day care?!!!”
Oops. Maybe I shouldn’t have said that.
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I find Marmite more aggressive than Vegemite, taste wise. Vegemite is milder and certainly goes better with beer. A swig of beer and a bite of vegemite on bread works really well, but I haven’t been able to find Vegemite in stores/shops for a long time. I also like the added benefit/consolation that Marmite might be helping my mental health/mood through its vitamin B content. I also think I like it because I was introduced to it at an early age, but here’s another theory…
https://www.telegraph.co.uk/food-and-drink/news/marmite-love-hate-new-study-reveals-depends-genetics/
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In the 70s a Sydney tabloid was promoting a moral panic that kids were hitting up Vegemite to get high. Who knows how many rather stupid people actually tried it thanks to a made up newspaper story. I wonder if Marmite maintenance therapy is an effective treatment for Vegemite addiction.
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I once tried to eat a whole jar of nutmeg for the same reasons. (Not to get high but to relax). The herb, in its dry form, is very difficult to get down, even with gulps of water/milk in between. Well, I was young and silly at the time. It did relax me though.
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In the interest of harm minimisation …
https://au.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20081103194614AAJDePE
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Stop giving me ideas…
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Fun post🙂
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Very pleased you liked it Judy. Much appreciated.
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Don’t be fooled by this propaganda in the Australian edition of the Guardian.
The actual penalties hereabouts for un-Vegemitey activities are more severe than exile and can include Anzac biscuit crumbs in your bed and getting force-fed soggy Skippy cornflakes.
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Don’t be fooled by this propaganda from the Australian edition of the Guardian.
The actual penalties hereabouts for un-Vegemitey activities are more severe than exile and can include Anzac biscuit crumbs in your bed and getting force-fed soggy Skippy cornflakes.
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I thought you may be interested in my post on 1st April!
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